Tuesday, December 2, 2014

An open letter to my daughter's naptime

Dear Emma's nap time,

    I hope you remember me.  It's been days now since we've encountered each other, and quite honestly I miss you more than I can express.  I'm composing this letter to you against a recurring symphony of "MAMA!!!"'s in ascending and descending tones coming from the other room, a painful reminder of our separation.

   Side-note: the symphony took a brief pause when a small glowing technological entertainment device was presented to the conductor by a deranged audience member with unwashed hair and cozy pants as she attempted to hide what could be considered an "unhealthy" piece of leftover pumpkin pie in her right cheek...

  Back to us.  I guess three and a half years is a pretty good run.  We were good for each other.  I gave you an angelic unconscious child covered in love and peace and a "Frozen" quilt from Target's Black Friday Sale.  And you gave me the most wonderful gift of all.

  Alone time.

   Maybe I took you for granted.  Maybe all good things must come to an end.  Maybe my Pinterest boards were getting too full of my virtual home organization, unattempted kid crafts, and poorly imitated gluten free, dairy free baked goods.  Maybe sound proofing the inside of a child's room isn't as expensive as I imagine.  Maybe I shouldn't have eaten the entirety of the leftover pumpkin pie.

  Regardless, I'm thankful for what we had together.  And I'm not above shamelessly begging you to come back to me.  Until you decide, I will be curled up in a corner somewhere drinking the coffee that I promised myself to give up for the month of December and pinning "Quiet Time Activities for Tiny Humans" on Pinterest.

  Also, no pressure, but the whole title of my blog basically banks on your presence in my life.

   I will attempt yet again to meet you at my home tomorrow afternoon at approximately 1:45pm.  I'll come bearing coffee and chocolate.    

Sunday, November 23, 2014

Story of my life..

I've decided to title all of my blogs after One Direction songs from now on. As a 35 year old woman, I feel like this is a really wise step for me.

I dedicate this blog entry to every boy band, and also to my lovely friend Jess who refuses to join Facebook and instead insists that I blog about my life instead of just seeing how many "likes" I can get on pictures of my homemade vegan, dairy free, gluten free, nut free, sugar free, carrageenan free scones.

I have deemed this past week for my family the "Week of Isolation." It all started when my husband and I had the crazy idea to try to get away for our first kid free overnighter. Who does that???

We don't.

Because when we try, our son wakes up sounding like a seal.

Not this one.
 This one.

The Doctor heard one bark and immediately said "Yep, that's croup." Thus validating every webmd.com search I have ever completed in my life.

In the end we did take the adorable tiny human seal along for our overnighter. And my mom kindly stayed with the elder tiny, who also ended up sick. I got to escape to Target this week though, so all was not lost!

In bigger news, after MUCH prayer and conversation between my delightful husband and I, we have decided that we feel our time at South Everett Foursquare Church is coming to a close.

It's the biggest decision we've had to make in our marriage, and it wasn't at all an easy one. We have been spoiled with a group of incredibly mature, generous, kind, loving people who have graciously allowed us to grow and learn, and most importantly have allowed me the freedom to simply be a mama to my tinies without any pre-conceived ideas or demands of what a pastor's wife should look like. I could not be more thankful. All of these aforementioned people have been equally gracious as we've communicated our departure.  We trust that there are really good things ahead for this amazing group of people :)

The biggest question now for us of course is, "What's next?"

The answer: We have no idea!

It's not the answer we'd like to have :)

We feel a distinct peace in the midst of such uncertainty that can only come from the Lord.  We want to know what's next of course, but ultimately we want to do our best to be faithful right where we are. I have never experienced a lack of faithfulness from Jesus in my life, only His abundance both in love and grace.  I love my sweet husband and tiny humans and I'm genuinely excited for what's next for the four of us.  We welcome prayers and free trips to Disneyland!

I'm sorry,  I can't resist Disneyland...

Monday, September 29, 2014

We are young.

I turned 35 today.  It's easier to type that out than write it down on paper.  I just feel as if what I equate this elusive "35" to be is so far from where I am.  I am partly a grown up now I suppose because I go grocery shopping, I've been driving for almost 20 (!!!!) years, I just became physically ill while typing that last portion, and I have tiny people that call me "Mama" and demand that I put their needs ahead of my own (for the most part).

I had envisioned waking up rested and refreshed this morning to greet the new number I am privileged to wear.  Instead, I found myself quite awake and in tears at 4:15 am because my husband's kind plan to give me the night off was met with deafening protests from a teething one year old.  It was a chance to catch up on my East Coast early morning birthday wishes on Facebook however, so there's the bright side.

Sidenote, sometimes, I just throw commas into my paragraphs somewhat randomly because I'm uncertain as to how they should be used. That's one thing I'm unwilling to leave behind with 34.

I feel like birthdays are a second shot at New Years resolutions.  I love a good, solid fresh start.  Sometimes I need to have about 48 of them in a day with my sweet three year old.  Some of my personal resolutions for this new year include healthier eating (after tomorrow when Briell brings over McDonalds for lunch...), an increase in my prayer life throughout my days, a stronger understanding and conviction of my identity in Christ, and more creative outlets.  I will of course be continuing to impress social media with my Pinterest recipes and creations, including this latest one below.  It looks like it's straight out of an amazon.com picture I realize, but it was actually taken in my home and created completely by hand out of leftover boxes from unnamed products.

I give to you, Emma and Ben's very own washer and dryer.  Also, it should be noted that I made this when I was only 34, so look for a more energy efficient version of this to appear on the interweb in the next 12 months.

Tuesday, July 8, 2014

It's like Facebook, but without the self-assurance of that little "Like" button

It's 10:30 at night.  My children have been silent for at least an hour now.  I normally pride myself on being someone who never complains about the heat in WA, but when it makes the tiny people I live with unable to sleep well, I take some issue.

Since I can't bring myself to be creative on two separate social media outlets, here's a little glimpse at my earlier Facebook status which prompted this fancy blog entry on this super high tech site with the ridiculously long name...

"There is nothing sweeter than the sound of a tiny voice saying "Mama."

Unless of course it is at full volume, from behind a bedroom door, competing with the screams of a 9.5 month old in a separate room, for the entirety of what should have been an afternoon nap.  In the above case, it can be likened to the sound of screeching metal, cats in heat, booming fireworks that awaken your children at night, and of course the merciless death of a mother's dream of being alone to eat banana bread and virtually pin things she will never have time or energy to complete.

The end."

Now, perhaps I wasn't entirely fair to myself in regards to my Pinterest endeavors.  I mean after all I did make THIS today!

Well, sort of.  I spent a good 3 hours total cooking, cooking, cooking...and really just burning the heck out of this concoction below...


One of my goals in life is to really make Pinterest proud, so I do crazy things like substitute avocado for butter and maple syrup for refined sugar.  It sounds really impressive on paper, but apparently it doesn't translate to photography. 

In the end it was probably my most hideous of Pinterest creations and yet it was entirely delightful, and I may have consumed nearly the entire thing today with a small amount of help from the eldest tiny human..

On a final note, you know it's been a bit of a long day when you hear a loud crash from the living room and come in to find your almost 10 month old son in his walker, his sister's plate of fruit on the floor, and an oversized watermelon rind in his adorable grabby hands.  And you do nothing but take a picture and go back to making dinner...